5 Self-Care Tips for Fall

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Hello Ladies,

Fall is upon us! I can’t express how excited I am for fall this year. There have been a lot of great changes that happened in summer that I will be able to finally settle into and I can’t think of a more perfect season to be experiencing right now than fall. It was uncharacteristically hot this summer for Seattle and I do not do well in hot weather! That coupled with a lot of traveling and moving has left me in an exhausted daze which is why it is an absolute necessity that I give myself some TLC as the temperature starts to cool down into my favorite season.
One of the top things I hear women talk about is wanting more self-care. The next comment that inevitably follows is that they are too busy and don’t have the time or the money. I’ve definitely fallen into this type of thinking before, but it doesn’t last too long because I know that this is not just a want, but a need for me and no matter what you tell yourselves, I know you need it too!
When we don’t take care of ourselves, not only do we feel it, but our family, friends and colleagues feel it too. I know that I am better at home, work, and life when I give myself time to honor and love myself.
On that note, here are my 5 self-care tips that will leave you feeling energized, relaxed and ready to live your beautiful life!

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1. Schedule a ‘Self-Care Sunday’

Sundays are my days that I dedicate to self-care. This does not mean that I neglect myself the rest of the week, but setting aside one day helps me to schedule it and not let other things get in the way. I like to schedule a massage and something fun like shopping to treat myself.

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2. Move in the morning

Even before I leave the bed I love to stretch my body for 3-5 minutes and wake up my muscles. Now that the weather is getting cold, our bodies may need an extra nudge to wake us up from those last layers of sleep and stretching is such a simple and easy way to give ourselves that extra boost.

 

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3. Lay in the sun

Yes, even in fall and winter our bodies need sunlight! Just because it isn’t beach weather doesn’t mean that you can’t benefit from the laying down in the sunshine. I lay down on my deck in the mid-afternoon for a few minutes to feel healthier, lower depression and maybe even slip into a cat nap!

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4. Bring out the nail polish

Now is the perfect time to enjoy your warm brown and deep red nail polishes. The process of cleaning and painting my nails leaves me feeling so chic and put together. Whenever I see a woman with clean and polished nails, I see a woman who takes time to honor and care for herself, so take 20 minutes and do the same for yourself!

 

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5. Candlelight dinner at home

I’ve already written about my ritual of preparing a candlelight dinner, but I encourage you to try it for yourself as well. Take time to think of something delicious to prepare, enjoy shopping for the ingredients and finally cook up a gorgeous meal to share (or not!) by candlelight. I guarantee you’ll feel so pampered and relaxed that you won’t want to dine any other way!
I encourage you to choose one or two of these and include these in your week. You don’t have to do all of them or even any of them! Maybe you don’t care about your nails but you like sleeping in and staying in bed. Self-care is not a chore or assignment and is going to be something different for all of us. The important thing to know is that when we take care of ourselves, we bring out the best version of ourselves to us and others – and that’s worth taking time for. What does self-care mean for you?

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Candlelight Dinner for One? Yes, please.

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I eat dinner alone most of the time.

Not because I’m single or friendless, but because while my husband is content with chowing down in front of the T.V. while nestling on the couch, I absolutely insist on eating dinner at a table that is fully set with plates, silverware, cloth napkins and candlelight.

I can understand that most people, including my husband, might find this ritual out-dated, unnecessary and tiresome. After all, after a long day’s work in this society’s hustle and bustle, what can be more comfortable and relaxing than eating some food and zoning out in front of a screen? The promise of a comfy and cozy body and stomach and easy entertainment can be too much for some people to give up.

I have my grandmother to thank for my peculiar dinner habits. She was Austrian. By that I mean that she was born in Austria and came through Ellis Island with her mother and younger sister on a boat that left from Germany. I spent a lot of time with her during my formative years and I remember her as being one of the most elegant and sophisticated women I ever had the privilege of knowing. She had such class and a sense of decorum about everything that she did and she is the reason why I dine the way I do. Without fail, for every meal she would have me help her set the table while she put the finishing touches on a delicious and nutritious meal. This included all of silverware (all of it!), cloth napkins, place mats, dishes and flowers for breakfast and lunch but a candle for dinner.

When I was a young child and helping her with this, it seemed like such a chore. Now that I am older and she is no longer with us, I remember her whenever I complete my evening ritual. I find that I also eat better and slower than my husband and I don’t think this is a coincidence. I know that there a many people that promote this “slow food” lifestyle, and I’m glad to have been exposed to it from a young age by my grandmother.

It is truly amazing how the simple and shared act of preparing a dinner table can have such lifelong effects on someone. I hope that one day if I have any children, that they’ll take after me and learn to acquire this ritual.

What rituals do you have that are important to you?

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Stop Working On All of Your Goals

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If you’re anything like me, you have a lot of projects and a lot of goals that you’re trying to achieve all at once. And if you find yourself in a cycle of starting, losing steam a few days in, stopping, feeling bad for stopping and then vowing you’ll finally see a project through this time, let’s do both of ourselves a favor and end this circus.

I have discovered a more effective way of finishing my goals sans the self-doubt and discouragement. It’s so simple, yet easy to overlook in a world that demands us to be bigger, faster, stronger. Here it is:

Begin only one goal at a time and focus on mastering your process

How I used to operate is, I would have a burst of enthusiasm that was probably inspired by my procrastination and start to work on a list of things that I wanted to achieve. I would start a blog, exercise everyday, learn Arabic, create a meal plan, read a book a week, and start writing a book all at once. I would have a lot of fun planning all of this out, but the longest I’ve ever gone on this sort of regime was probably 2 weeks. Not exactly a sufficient time frame to even begin to make a small dent in that list.

The reason I would inevitably give up on everything is that I had not yet mastered the different processes for each item on that list. I was being pulled in too many directions at once without firmly establishing the rhythm of even one project into my life.

What must be done instead is start with one. For example, if I was learning Arabic at the beginning of the month I would start my process by committing to study at least 10 pages from a self-guided language learning book, or 1 exercise a day, or whatever method of measurement is the right fit for me.

After I giving myself enough time to form the habit of learning Arabic, let’s say 1 month, I can add on starting a blog. I will commit myself to that new process of posting twice a week for a month before adding on another project. If at any point, I have begun to slip in my processes, I will need to remove the very last project that was added and wait another month before re-assimilating it.

It could be that I reached my mental or physical capacity for learning and working on new things, so instead of stopping all of my projects, I can sacrifice delaying one. This way I will strengthen my capability to learn and my other projects will continue moving along.

With this method of incrementally adding goals or projects to your list, I believe you will find yourself finishing them quicker. This method is really a system that helps you learn how to learn, which is an absolute necessity for success. It’s been a game changer for me and I you should try it too — I am asking you to do less after all!

Let me know what you guys think,

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Book Review: Approaching the Qur’an

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It has been a while hasn’t it?

Between Ramadan, the new house, the new job, I haven’t been able to find much time to read, let alone write about what I’ve read. I’ve just settled into my a routine so I should be able to return to my usual antics. Then again, I am going to Korea in two weeks so I guess maybe not. We shall see.

Anyway, last night I finished reading “Approaching the Qur’an” by Michael Sells. You may have heard about it before as this book was at the crux of a contentious lawsuit brought forward in 2002 by three students at the University of North Carolina, whose incoming students were assigned it as a summer reading assignment. But never mind all of that. If you haven’t read it before — like me — and you are non-Arabic speaking Muslim — like me, this book will let you experience first-hand the poetry of the Qur’an.

One of my greatest goals is to be able to one day understand the Qur’an as Arabic speakers do. To listen to a recitation and be moved by the rich literature and poetry of the Qur’an is something that I so dearly want to experience. Until my understanding of Arabic and Qur’anic grammar reaches that level, I will have to settle for the English translations. While the translations may help me know what is being said, they are useless in conveying the same poetic impact that it brought upon those who heard it when it was first revealed.

This book does not cover the entire Qur’an. Sells translates Al-Fatiha, a portion of sura 53 (The Star), and then suras 81 through 114. Sells attempts translate not only the meaning of the words, but also the poetic devices of the original text. Reading Sells’ translations makes me feel as though I am reading the Qur’an for the first time. I felt moved in a way that I wasn’t before and I could understand how impactful the text could be especially in a recited format. Nevertheless, this is a translation and there is always something of meaning lost when a text a translated, so of course this will be the case with the Qur’an. However, to give you a taste of what I mean, here is a comparison of Sells’ translation and the Sahih International translation of sura 104, “The Slanderer”:

Sahih International

Woe to every scorner and mocker

Who collects wealth and [continuously] counts it.

He thinks that his wealth will make him immortal.

No! He will surely be thrown into the Crusher.

And what can make you know what is the Crusher?

It is the fire of Allah , [eternally] fueled,

Which mounts directed at the hearts.

Indeed, Hellfire will be closed down upon them

In extended columns.

Sells’

Woe to every backbiting slanderer

Who gather his wealth and counts it

thinking with his wealth he will never die

Nay, let him be thrown into the Hútama

And what can tell you of the Hútama

The fire of God, stoked for blazing

rising up over the heart

covering them in vaults of flame

stretching out its pillars

There’s a fundamental difference between those two translations. The meaning is the same, but the impact lies in not only what is said but also what is not said in Sells’ version. I so wish that Sells could come out with a complete translation of the entire Qur’an. If there are any non-Muslims out there reading this review who would like to read a translation of the Qur’an, I urge you to start with this book. It doesn’t have the whole entire Qur’an, but it gives you a hint of the power that the original text brings to its readers and listeners in Arabic. The book also contains a CD in the back that allows to you listen to the Qur’an since the Qur’an is truly intended to be recited and listened to — not read. Even the Muslims out there who depend on the English translations to understand what is being said, read this! It will bring a whole new dimension to the suras you’ve read before and possibly some new meaning to you as well.

Eid Mubarak and Ramadan Reflections

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We just finished fasting our last day of Ramadan and I wanted to wish those who were fasting a congratulatory “Eid Mubarak” to you all!

This Ramadan was especially trying for me and my husband since during this time we bought a house and moved into the house and experienced all of the uncertainty and stresses that go with that. At an especially challenging point of the process my husband and I just had to let go of all of the worry, frustration and anxiety and enter into space of surrender to Allah. Also, during this same time I was promoted to a my dream position with the company I work for. While this was happy news for me, it was still a change from what I was used to and between moving at home and moving into a new role at work, I was feeling very disoriented and not my usual self. We completed our istikhara and wished for Allah to facilitate this home-buying experience for us if it was for the best or to end it if it was not. We’ve always known that nothing is in our control and as much as we try to plan and prepare for things, in the end, Allah’s will supersedes all. We did end up by getting the house — alhamdulillah — and now that I am sitting here in my new home and prepared to start my new position next week, I see that nothing was ever truly in my control so there was no need to worry.

I hope that I am able to keep this lesson within me and refer to it whenever I find myself falling into a endless pit of fear and distress because everything always works out — sometimes in ways that you planned, often times in ways that you didn’t even imagine.

Once again, Eid Mubarak everybody and may Allah accept all of our fasts and efforts during this blessed month!

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