Category: Thoughts & Inspiration

Make A Choice!

Published on by Eve CrabappleLeave a comment

I am sitting here drinking my home-made hot chocolate and enjoying a slice of strawberry cheesecake. And I am thinking about the change that has overcome me at work. I had a great week at work. Not necessarily from a production standpoint, but from a process perspective. There were so many new roles that I needed to perform and I had some trouble getting down my process and mustering the confidence to stick to that process no matter how stupid I felt doing it.

 

Home-made hot chocolate is so much better than store bought!

But then I had this realization that…no one is a success overnight and everyone had to start somewhere. That even those who were the most successful in my role had to have failed before and that the only difference between them and the others is that they chose to believe that they wouldn’t let anything hinder them from doing as well as they believed they could. Everyone gets scared, feels stupid, gets rejected, gets told “no”, but stopping at those moments means you become like everyone else. Everyone else who makes excuses about the client, about the job, about the market, about the expectations, about everybody and everything else besides themselves. Pointing fingers and justifying their failures in a way that absolves them of the blame when the truth is that no one else but themselves are to blame. You know, it’s so easy to deflect. It feels good to not be the reason why you can’t do something. It means that you don’t need to change. That you have done everything that you need to do and it is out of your hands — it’s not your fault. But what goes unsaid, is that when you do this to yourself, it also means that you don’t get better. That you don’t get to see what you are actually capable of. That you don’t learn. That you don’t surprise yourself anymore.

So you need to make a choice. A choice to get back up, get out, get better, do better, keep going, explore your abilities, surprise others. Make a choice to be the stuff of wonder and possibility that sparks others to do the same.

signature

Peaceful Saturday Night…

Published on by Eve CrabappleLeave a comment

I’m sitting here after having enjoyed a spaghetti dinner that was made from scratch with sourdough garlic bread (not from scratch). It took the sauce about 2 hours to fully simmer together, but it was worth it and I now have enough marinara sauce for the next 2 weeks (ha). I wish had this much time to invest into cooking our meals during the week day, but I am just so tired when I get back from work that sometimes I just want to pass out in my bed as soon as I walk in the door. Now that the weather has gotten rainier, windier and darker, I find it more difficult to get my energy up for those everyday things. I can’t wait to be able to set my own schedule and work my own hours!

image1 [42886]_edited
Yummy!! We all deserve indulgences from time to time!

Anyway, I’m going to finish up my hot chocolate with marshmallows and head to bed. I’m sitting next to the window listening to the wind blow through the trees and I am so grateful for what I have. I often think about how things can be different which can be a good motivator to change, however, I don’t reflect often enough on how far I’ve come and truly see what I have.

signature

Are you a planner or…?

Published on by Eve CrabappleLeave a comment

Are you someone who plans their day out? Or do you prefer allowing the day’s events to unfold and seeing where they take you?

For me, I cannot be truly happy about a day without a plan.

It probably has to do with my hectic, extra-curricular activity filled upbringing, but it is difficult for me to feel content with a day’s events without having made progress in the majority of the following categories: work, studies, fitness, and my various pastimes. When I was a child and I hated summer vacation because I loved the structured day that a normal school day and after school activities created for me. As a working adult, I don’t have summer vacations, but I don’t like the weekends. For me, it’s just a really long stretch of time that I try my best to fill with my activities just so that I can go back to the structure that the work week gives me. To avoid feeling like the weekend was a waste of 48 hours, I need to plan out what I will be studying, reading, and writing. Needless to say, I get a lot done. However, my husband and other family members comment on my incessant need to be doing something, that I find myself wondering if I’m missing out on something that the rest of the human race seems to look forward to.

I tried not planning to do anything on a weekend once. No studying, no writing, no educational reading, no exercising, no errands, just doing whatever my husband did whenever he did it. Throughout the day I felt anxious and slightly irritated that nothing was getting done. I found myself overcome by the deep feeling of stagnation that I found stifling. I ended the day feeling unaccomplished and thoroughly un-relaxed. And that was the last time I tried to out the “no plan is the plan” approach to my day.

Perhaps there’s some sort of deep-seated psychological reason to why I feel the need to always be working on something, whether its my schooling, learning a skill, writing something, or whatever, but if it makes me feel happy and fulfilled at the end of the day then it must be fine.

What about you? Do you plan your days out like me? Or no?

signature